Hey Jude
by crossroadswrite
Summary: What if instead of transporting our lovely boys to an alternative universe, we transported the alternative universe? Well, apparently there's an adorable little girl and two guys who are a weird mix of Dean and Cas and Sam and Gabriel. And apparently they need help because in this alternative universe they don't seem to take so good on angels and humans having kids.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own this characters, well except one. I call dibs on the little girl.

**A/N:**This will be updated alternating Saturadays and Sundays. The first update shoul've come on Saturday, but due to internet issues and moms who get into car accidents I wasn't able to post then. The next update will be expected to come next Sunday.  
Also we have to give credit where credit is due, so a great thanks to thespywhospies on tumblr for her 2nd Generation of Winchesters. You should go check that out to see how the hunky hunks who play the Winchesters kids look like.  
Also take notice that english is not my first language and this is unbeated. All mistakes are mine.

«»

Dean and Sam get a break in the case they are currently working on and decide to stop at a local diner to eat some lunch. And about time, because Dean hasn't eaten for about two hours and he was starting to get hungry.

They sit on a booth facing each other and a cute waitress who smiles brightly at Sam (which is weird, but whatever Dean doesn't care that she totally ignored him) takes their order.

They chat for a bit, about the case. About what is expected to be an easy salt and burn and it shouldn't take more than five minutes. Except of course things never are that simple and Dean just _knows_ that something will go wrong and one of them is going to get their ass kicked by a vengeful creepy-ass ghost.

The waitress comes back with their orders and another smile for Sam, not so discretely slipping him her phone number.

Dean snorts and wiggles his eyebrow at his brothers, quipping something about the lion mane charm that Sam uses to attract chicks, and seriously Sammy give me five minutes with some clippers.

Sam bitchfaces and opens his mouth to replay when it happens.

One moment he's sitting at the dinner and then everything drowns out and all Dean can hear is a loud, panicked child crying in his head, echoing and making something painfully and ugly twist in his chest. There's the sensation of falling through space and the misplaced air around thim, and Dean falls ass first in the dirty warehouse floor.

He jumps up to his feet as fast as he can and reaches for his gun. Looks around him and surveys the empty warehouse, his eyes falling into a far corner where a little girl as her back pressed against the wall and big fat tears roll down her face. Three adults circling her like vultures, cutting her way out.

Somehow Dean just knows that these are demons and white hot rage sparks in his chest.

He takes the demon knife from his jacket and advances on them, using the element of surprise to take the first one out. A woman in her late thirties wearing a skirt and a blouse, hair pulled back in a bun. Dean carves the knife into her heart and pulls it back quickly as the woman crumbles to the ground.

There's still two more to deal with and Dean is a good hunter, but he's outnumbered here. He didn't need to look when he feel ass first in here to know that Sam didn't come along for the trip.

The demons turn to him and one of manages to punch Dean in the face so hard that he goes flying straight to a wall.

He lands harshly and hears something pop out of place, but he quickly dismisses it and hops back onto his feet, getting himself between the girl and the demons.

"Wanna dance?" He spits at the demons face, a boy that must be around twenty years old, wearing dirty chucks and ripped jeans "Let's dance, bitch." He says twisting the knife and slashing the air where the demon had been a minute before.

The other demon tries to attack him from one side, but he's expecting it and sidesteps the demon, slashing his arm. The demon falls back.

The younger demon takes one step forward to try his luck again, but suddenly his eyes and mouth are shinning and Dean quickly closes his eyes. The demon crumbles in front of him to reveal Cas, who looks like he's about to bring God's wrath on whomever steps in his way.

The other demon looks between Cas and Dean and tries his luck at escaping. He runs for the door, but Cas is near him in a split second and Dean hears the pitiful groan of it being exorcised, just as he turns to the little girl behind him.

She's just a little thing. Shouldn't be more than five or six, with light brown hair and wide green eyes. Her lip is quivering and her cheeks are tearstained. She has both arms wrapped around her knees as she trembles.

Dean wipes the blade to his pant legs and tucks it back in place. He slowly squats down, wincing at the sharp pain in his shoulder, which he probably dislocated when he fell.

"It's okay." He says softly "The bad guys are gone now." He stretches out a hand for her to take "It's okay. I won't hurt you. I'm the good guy." He continues, trying to coach the girl into letting go of her knees and getting her back to her parents.

The girl stops trembling and slowly releases the vice hold she has on her legs. She clumsily wipes her cheeks and sniffles.

Dean is fully expecting the girl to cautiously take his hand and let him lead her out of this place, what he's not expecting his for the girl to practically leap into his arms and clutch at his neck like it's her favorite stuffed animal.

Dean startles a bit, but slowly wraps his arms around the girl and stands up, letting her little legs wrap around his torso, bonny knees digging into his ribs.

"It's okay. You're okay now." He whispers softly, rubbing a hand through the girl's back.

"Dean." Castiel calls, and when Dean turns around, the angel is standing a few feet away, eyeing the child like she might explode any second now "She called me." He says and he's obviously distressed about this "Dean," Castle shuffles in place, uneasily "how did you get here?" he asks, blue eyes focused on Dean own now.

"Uh," he frowns "Angel Express, I think? I'm not sure. I was at the dinner with Sam and suddenly I was here."

Castiel nods, focusing again on the girl in his arms.

"You did that? Angel whammied me here?"

Cas shakes his head, gaze studying the girl likes she's become the most interesting thing he has ever seen.

"She called me." He says again, as if it answers every question Dean as.

"So you've said. So what?" he asks irritably, because seriously, this is becoming a little redundant.

"You don't understand. She called me by my name in _enochian_."

Oh! Oh, well, that's- that's something. He needs to get back to Sam and figure this mess out. Like yesterday.

"Can you take me back to Sam? I think I need some pie." He says.

The girl perks up immediately. Little head snapping up and green eyes staring at him widely, like he just told her unicorns were real and there was one waiting for her in the backyard.

"Yes, please, daddy. I loves me some pie." She quips smiling brilliantly and sniffling once.

And he would have laugh except _WHAT IN THE FUCKING SHIT DID THIS GIRL JUST CALLED HIM?!_

He looks at Cas, heart beating faster and shit, is he having a panic attack? Shit shit shit. This isn't supposed to happen. He's always careful. _Always._ There's no chance in hell that this girl is his kid.

"Cas?"

The angel opens his mouth as if to assure him, but shuts it again.

"Cas!" he barks.

"Let me fix your shoulder." He says instead and just when in the fuck did the angel get good at deflecting?!

Cas steps forwards and squeezes his shoulder once, setting it back in place and then he lifts two fingers to Dean's forehead and there's the same displacement of air and the sense of falling through space before Dean finds himself back in the booth he had been, maybe ten minutes ago. He's not sure how long it has been.

The waitress that took their order, passes by them and stops. She blinks a couple of times and takes in the picture. Dean sitting with a little girl in his lap and Cas pressed shoulder to shoulder.

Dean glares at her, when her gaze lingers for too long and she clears her throat awkwardly "If you're looking for the other gentleman that was sitting here, he just left. I'm sure you'll be able to catch up with him."

"I'll go get Sam." Cas answers gravely, which receives another look from the waitress, but yeah everyone gets that look when they hear his voice for the first time.

Dean nods and grabs his arm, before he thinks in vanishing in front of the girl.

"Meanwhile could you get us a piece of pie?" he asks.

The little girl wiggles in his lap and turns her cuteness level to maximum, leveling the waitress with a happy grin "Apple please." She asks with the perfect mix of shyness and confidence.

The woman smiles down at the girl and nods.

"Coming right up, sweetheart." She answers kindly, she looks up at Dean and smiles "You have a wonderful child. She looks just like you." And that's about all that Dean can do not to choke and die.

The waitress turns around and Dean lets go of Cas' arm so the angel can go get Sam, leaving Dean alone with an armful of little girl who thinks she's his daughter.

The girl looks up at him and squints her eyes. She tilts her head slightly to the side.

"Daddy. Did you do something bad?"

Well, that came out of nowhere.

"Why do you ask?" he is completely ignoring the daddy part.

"Because I can't see it. Did you fight with grandpa? Did you burn one of his bible books again?" she asks suspiciously.

"I- what?" he's so confused right now.

Cas and Sam materialize in their respective seats, just as the little girl asks "Are you Falling?"

Castiel stiffens beside him and Sam is looking dumbstruck at the girl.

"No." he answers carefully.

The girl turns to Cas "Dadda," she says reaching one hand out to wrap in Cas trench coat and using it as leverage to climb into Cas' lap, while Dean is too busy choking on his own saliva, because WHAT?!

The little girl seems unperturbed by his reaction though "Dadda," she says again grabbing Cas' face in her tiny hands and leveling him with most serious look a five-year-old can muster up "I can't see daddy's grace." She states "Is he okay?"

Dean's entire vocabulary, which is not that vast, is reduced to incomprehensive jumble and a series of _shitshitshitshitfuckmylife_ and WHAT?!

That's about it. At least the question 'what about the mom?' is no longer tormenting, because apparently he had a kid with Cas and he is a freackin' angel. Just fucking great!

"I think this child is in the wrong reality." Castiel murmurs.

The waitress chooses that moment to come back with two pieces of pie, sliding one on front of Dean and the other in front of the girl.

"That one is on the house." She says with a warm smile.

The girl, and shit he doesn't even know his own daughter's name, bats her eyelashes and smiles prettily at the waitress.

"Pie!" the little girl cries out happily, twisting in Cas' lap and reaching for the fork.

Sam snorts. "She's definitely your daughter." He quips as the girl shoves more pie on her face than on her mouth.

Dean sends him a dark look and a kick on the calf for good measure, before pulling the fork away from her and cutting the pie in smaller bits that are manageable and have a better chance to actually making it to the girl's mouth.

For the next five minutes or so the girl completely ignores them, focusing on her pie.

Dean looks down at his pie, and he's not really hungry anymore, so he decides on cutting it in smaller pieces as well and gently sliding it over to the girl's side when she's finished with her slice.

The girl squeals happily and climbs to his lap to briefly smack a sticky kiss on his cheek and say 'I love you daddy.' Before she goes back to the pie again. She leaves Dean staring, a little dumbfounded at her and with the stupidest grin on his face. Which is really fucked up because this is not even his kid.

He clears his throat and puts on his game face, turning back to Cas "You were saying something about another reality."

Sam leans over the table to listen better. Being the huge nerd that he is, he'll be hanging on every single word Cas will say and he'll probably take notes too.

"There's a theory that dictates that if you can imagine something then it's probably a reality in a parallel universe. My best guess as to what this child does here is that someone in one of those realities, accidentally or not sent her here."

"Like when you and Balthazar sent us to that reality where we were douche actors?"

Castiel looks down apologetically, but nods and Dean is still kinda pissed at that, but he could hit Sam for having to bring that up.

Dean works is jaw "So, basically what you're saying is that in one alternative universe you and I have a kid, I have grace and Sam's a moose. That it?" he chimes in to distract Cas, who still looks like a kicked puppy.

Castiel frowns "I have no information that Sam is a moose- Oh." He catches on when Dean lifts his eyebrows at him "You're attempting humor."

Sam snorts, and then smiles broadly at both of them, waggling his eyebrows a bit and what the fuck? Since when did he turn into Dean?!

"Shut up." He growls before Sam as time to even open his mouth.

They are most definitely not talking about this one. Nope.

"And how do we send her back? Because dude, if in any universe this is my kid and I have angel mojo, I'd be planning on executing some massive ass kicking right about now." He informs both of them, and as if on cue the entire structure of the dinner shakes and lighting strikes where lightning should not strike.

The windows are shaking and threatening to splinter in a thousand pieces when it all stops at the same time.

Next blink of an eye, there are two young men sitting with them. One who pulled a chair at the head of the booth, in his early twenties, scruffy jaw, messy dark hair and blue eyes. He looks so much like Cas that Dean could cry. Next to Sam there's a kid who must be a little older than the first one, but not by much. Tall, almost as tall as Sam with long blonde hair, hazel eyes and a dimpled smile. He looks like a young Sam and like. . . someone that Dean can't quite place until he makes a lollipop appear out of nowhere and pops it in his mouth. And oh, you have got to be shitting me right now, because if that's not downright Gabriel and Sam mixed spunk (ew) in there Dean doesn't know what it is.

The first guy, smiles charmingly and shit if he doesn't see his own smile reflected in there, and does the favor of introducing them.

"Hey dad," he look at Dean and then at Cas when he says "father. My name is James. I'm your son. That little ray of sunshine with pie right there is Mary Jude. And this is my good cousin Henry."

Henry turns to Sam with a mischievous smile "'Sup, dad."

Sam opens his mouth and closes it like a fish and Dean doesn't know whether he should cry or laugh with the weird situation.

He decides on the later, snorting at all of them and stealing a piece of pie from his 'daughter'who makes a little indignant noise in the back of her throat but doesn't go much past that.

He flags the waitress and order three beers. He's going to need alcohol to handle this one. And something tells him that Sam will too. And probably Cas would like to find the closest liquor store and give it his best try.

Yeah, there's going to be needed alcohol for him not to freak out and start shooting civilians.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean Winchester's life sucks sometimes. Well, all the time. He can count on one hand the good things he has right now.

His baby, Sam, the man of letters bunk. Some friends scattered around. Charlie and Benny and Kevin and Krissy. Sometime ago he would've counted Cas within that group of people, but that was before. Before he pulled a disappearing act on them and even if Dean prayed his heart out he wouldn't come.

He's a little unsure of what to do regarding Cas.

He's much more unsure of what do to with the boys in his back seat and the little girl who insists in calling him daddy with such adoration that it's honestly freaking him out.

And he has to tell the truth. He feels a little betrayed that Cas came for the little girl and not for him all those times he called.

Sam fidgets in his seat throwing worried looks over his back and eyeing Henry like he carries the plague.

"I think this is one of the weirdest things we've ever done." Sam mutters, and Dean grips the wheel tighter in his hands, grunting his accord.

He chances a look through the mirror and sees Henry awkwardly pressed against the window, trying to fit in a space that's too small for him, James in the middle sit, smiling broadly at Henry and his discomfort, and then Cas against the opposite window with little Mary Jude on his lap. If anything happens and Dean isn't able to prevent the Impala from crashing against a tree, he needs for Cas to zap out of there and keep her safe. He figures the other two can deal.

"Dude, if you kept your eyes front that wouldn't have happened." James complains.

Henry grunts and glares at him "Cousie, you were the one staring at the dude's ass."

James opens his mouth and closes it again "Well, not like you weren't looking."

Henry shrugs with a wicked smile "It was a great ass to look at. Did you get his number?" he asks interestedly, leaning over James a little bit.

James smirks that devil-may-care Dean Winchester patented smile and produces a napkin with a phone number scribbled on it.

Dean snorts a laugh and has to resist the urge to crow 'That's my boy', because it would be stupid and he's not really his boy at all.

Henry makes a move to grab it and James takes it out of his reach "Nu-uh. This one's mine. Get your own."

Henry leers at him and that's all kinds of wrong right there "We can share."

"Not doing that again, _cousie._ Don't you have like a girlfriend or something?" he questions and Henry huffs and leans back against the window.

"Just remember who my daddy is and what I've learnt with him over the years." He threatens.

James smiles broadly "Well, my daddy kicked your daddy in the butt. Several times."

"Just for the record which one of us kicked Gabriel's butt?" he needs to ask. His ego demands so, plus he's Dean Winchester. He's expected to ask this kind of stuff.

James smiles smugly at him "Which time?"

Dean burst out laughing elbowing Sam in the side, and that's when James' hair catches fire.

Dean swerves the car and they almost crash against a truck, but thanks to years of hunting and driving, Dean's reflexes allow him to swerve the car to the other side, sending it safely to the dirty path. He slams on the breaks and breathes hard.

Shit that was scary.

When he looks back again, James' hair looks fine and Henry is soaking wet.

"What in the shit did just happen?" he shouts back at them.

"Henry set my hair on fire again."

"James threw me water."

They say at the same time.

Dean clenches his jaw tightly and glares at both of them.

"YOU DO NOT SET FIRES AND THROW WATER AT PEOPLE IN THE BACKSEAT OF THE IMPALA! THOSE ARE THE RULES!" he could murder them right now. Honest, he could.

Cas materializes again in the seat and Dean hadn't even realized he was gone.

"Dean is right. You can't put in risk the lives of the ones travelling with you over petty arguments. You could have injured your sister and both the Winchesters if they had crashed. I understand that everyone has grace where you come from, but here they are very much mortal and dead is a possibility." Castiel admonishes calmly.

The boys mutter something like sorry and hung their heads slightly.

"I'm going to ask you both to change places. Cas can you sit in the middle, before I have to strap one of them to the roof?"

Castiel nods and in the blink of an eye James and Cas switched places.

Mary Jude giggles a little bit, little hand firmly against Cas' chest and wide eyes trained on her brother.

She reaches over with her little hand and pats him in the shoulder, before turning back to Dean "Does this mean that I get to have his pie?"

Dean can't help it. He snorts a laugh and smiles broadly at the girl.

"Yes, yes it does."

«»

Dean parks the Impala in front of the bunk and gets out of the car, fishing the keys from his pocket and unlocking the front door, trusting that the others will follow him shortly.

He turns the bunk's lights on and drops his bag next to the door. Sam can bitch about it later when Dean isn't on the edge of submitting himself in the psych ward of the nearest hospital.

James and Henry follow him inside plopping themselves down on the dining room table. Sam follows closely behind, keeping a safe distance between him and the boys: he sidesteps the boys and goes for the kitchen.

Castiel hesitates at the door for a beat, peering inside carefully, and that's when it hits Dean that he hadn't actually been in the bunk yet.

"Are you comin' in or are you waitin' for a written invitation, Cas?" he grunts, waiting for a response. Castiel adjusts Mary in his arms and takes a deep breath before taking a step in.

Once he's inside he sighs and walks towards the table, plopping down at the head of the table with an armful of happy little girl, her little hand still firmly pressed against Cas' chest.

Dean is about to comment on that when Sam comes back and hands him a cold beer. His brother goes for the table next, sitting with determination directly in front of Henry, and Dean has to keep the snort from escaping him because the poor sucker looks more relaxed when they're fighting a nest of vamps than when confronted with his son.

Henry leans over the table and smiles his best Gabriel-patented-smile at him, the one who says I-put-itching-powder-in-your-boxers-and-I'll-leave -you-to-guess-which-pair and Dean has to admit that maybe he got it easy.

He follows everyone and sits in front of James, Sam at his left and Cas at the head of the table at his right.

His - he can't even fucking think it without feeling uncomfortable – kid, smiles reassuringly at him and leans back patiently.

"What do you want to know?" he inquired calmly, all deep gravelly voice soft and patience.

Dean opens his mouth, because he has something close to a gazillion questions to ask, but then closes it again and frowns.

Where to start? What's really important?

He turns to Cas looking for some sort of guidance, but the angel isn't looking at him (there's a first time for everything after all!), he's taking in the entire room, the bunk. Eyes skittering around, not settling in something for too long.

Mary Jude has her face mashed up against Cas' chest and her chubby right hand still pressed against his chest, even though her eyelids are dropping and she's kind of nuzzling Cas' chest now, which Dean doesn't think it's adorable. Not at fucking all.

"You mentioned that Dean had grace." Sam starts and Henry jumps in quickly.

"Not just uncle Dean over there. You have some mojo too, daddy dearest." He smirks, "although yours is a little bit more. . ." he turns to James, raised eyebrow and pressed lips.

"Satanic." James supplies, crossing his arms firmly over his chest.

"Yeah. That." Henry says smiling broadly while Dean is busy choking on his beer.

"What?!" he wheezes, because WHAT?! He did not just fucking sent his little brother toppling down to the cage for fucking nothing.

"Not like that." James says nonchalantly "I am curious as to how you dealt with the situation here, but where we came from you two tricked uncle Lucy and uncle Mike. Got their grace and they turned human. There's not much the devil can do without his grace."

"Dad totally kicked uncle Lucy's ass to anger management rehab." Henry laughs, producing a cupcake out of thin hair and shoving it in his mouth.

Dean feels like throwing stuff. He wants to get up and topple over the table and start throwing every single old artifact against nearest the wall and watch as it shatters into a million pieces.

But he doesn't, he balls his fist and grits his teeth. Wills himself to keep calm, because those are his kids and Sam is probably going into shock or something and Cas- Cas just sits there looking awkward and ready to bolt at any second now.

"You mean to tell me that instead of sending my little brother to be Lucifer's chew toy in the cage I could've just stolen some mojo and make the big bad angels shut their cakeholes about the apocalypse thing?! Sammy went to hell when he didn't need to? _ That what you're telling me?"_

James shrugs and Henry is still smiling infuriatingly. His nephew or not, Dean is not above punshing him in the face.

"Wow, dad's right. You _are_ slow." He laughs and James clips him upside the head for his troubles.

"You'd probably hurt your hand if you tried." James smirks at him "So I saved you the trouble."

Dean snorts and looks over to Sam who looks troubled "You okay there, Sammy?" he asks, hand hovering over his brother's arm, ready to bolt into action if need be.

Sam has the frowny face going on, the one he gets when there's something in the case that doesn't quite match.

"The years are wrong." He mumbles more to himself; he lifts his eyes to the guys "the years are wrong. You two are like what? Twenty? You _have_ to be at least twenty, and that would put Dean having a kid at like thirteen. So the years are wrong. Not to mention that we didn't even _know_ Cas back then."

James uncrosses his arms and leans forwards, tilting his head and frowning slightly, going squinty eyed for a moment, before his eyes widen and lets out a little "Oh!" like it is so obvious and he doesn't know why he hadn't seen it before.

He licks his lips and looks sideways at Henry who also goes "Oh!" and apparently the two of them have the same silent language that he and Sam have.

Sam is leaning forward, giant hands clasped on top of the table, waiting patiently for the kids to elaborate.

Dean casts a glance at Cas, who's still not looking at him, but at their- he swallows hard before he thinks it –kid. And just then that thought hits him full force, slamming against him mercilessly.

He and Cas have a kid- two kids –together. Some him in another universe made a kid. With Cas. And first of all, how? Because as far as he knows dudes still can't get pregnant and the more he thinks about it the more his brain twist in knots because, which of them got knocked up and where would it even come out- and okay. Ew. Not thinking about that anymore.

"How did you two meet?" James asks and Dean welcomes the distraction because it was getting gross inside his own mind.

"He gripped me tight and raised me from perdition." He quips cheekily throwing a wink at Cas "Which sounds really gay, but yeah, he pulled my ass outta hell." Seeing that Cas and Dean have two kids, he thinks he shouldn't be so hung up on the gay thing. After all, likes boys and he likes girls and he likes fucking both of them, so there's no big deal there. He just doesn't see the point in labeling what's going on inside of his pants. That's his business, thank you very much.

James looks at Cas as if searching for confirmation. The angel nods once giving it to him.

"Why?" Sam chimes in again, always ready to make the real questions; even when Dean is freaking out about the entire having two kids with Cas thing, Sam was doing freaking math the giant nerd "How did they meet in your universe?"

Dean pays attention, because this he wants to hear.

James shrugs slightly "I don't know. As far as anyone can remember it's always been Dean and Castiel. And then Dean, Castiel and Sam."

"And after that it was Dean, Castiel, Sam and Gabriel." Henry continues with a shrug "Legend says that the moment uncle Dean was born, uncle Cas was waiting for him with pie and roses."

James snorts and elbows him on the side.

"As far as I know, father took Jimmy Novak's vessel when he was nine and dad was five and then he just. . . stuck around. The angel of Thursday and Dean Winchester. That's what uncle Balthazar used to call you, usually over a glass you whiskey."

"That still doesn't explain the age difference." Sam notes.

"Well, I came out with ten years old and already all the knowledge that I needed." James shrugs "It only took some of father's grace and one of dad's ribs. Grandfather is really stuck on the rib thing. And then dad joked that there wasn't any need of not having the same number of ribs in each side and ta-da. Grandfather created that little ray of sunshine." He said, pointing his chin at Mary Jude who was fast asleep on Castiel's lap. One of the angel's arms protectively wrapped around her little torso whilst her little hand was pressed against his chest, still.

Something clicks in his brain and Dean's head snaps toward the boys.

"God. You mean God." He says suddenly like it was the most obvious thing ever; Castiel perks up at that "God created you two and you know him." He says dumbly.

Henry does a great impression of Sam's frowny face "Well, yeah. Why, what's grandpappy up to in here?"

James is squinting, head tilted to one side "I know that he likes time to write his books and he's kind of a hermit, but you _must_ have met him sometime." He affirms.

Dean looks at Sam who looks just as lost as he seems; he turns his head to Cas but the angel looks just as clueless.

There's something niggling in the back of Dean's brain that he can't quite reach- something little Mary had said. . .

_Did you burn one of his bible books?_ He remembers, suddenly.

And suddenly he knows. He knows who God is and just what the shitting fuck?!

"Chuck." He chokes out, looking at the kids' faces because this has to be a joke or something. This has to be- but their nodding their heads and confirming it and just what?!

He hears Sam exhale loudly beside him and a quick glance shows Cas' eyes wide open, eyebrows up raised to his hairline.

"That little son of a bitch was freaking God? And he dated Becky? _Becky?!_ I don't even-" he shakes his head and takes another long pull off his beer.

Fucking Chuck and his prophecy bullshit.

"I'm going to gank that SOB." He growls into his beer.

"I think it would not be advisable to kill God, even if you can find his whereabouts." Castiel quips earning a glare all of his own.

"What did he ever do for us?" he bites angrily.

"He brought all of us back at least once." Castiel says calmly

Dean opens his mouth and then closes it again, because Cas has a point. God did do that, but it wouldn't hurt him to discipline his children every now and then would it?!

He's just about to tell exactly that, when Cas looks at him all apologetic guilt and puppy eyes.

And apparently that's all he needs to shut his cakehole and curse Cas for having that effect on him. He settles for grumbling a "Whatever." And drink the rest of his beer like a good boy.


	3. Author's Note

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **

Hello there, I am very sorry to infprm that this wil be on hiatus. The thing is: I was doing acrobatic gymnastics and deslocated my arm. I am currently wearing a cast thar imobilizes my entire left arm, and since I can't write as fast with only one hand, I won't be able to keep up with my schedule, therefore chapters will be really _slow_ into coming.

Once again, I'm really sorry, but the cast'll come off on the 24th and luckily I'll be able to return to my schedule. Which actually sucks because I was planning on doing NaNoWriMo this here and that's waaaay too close to November. Mixing up with my exams and all. . . Maybe I''l just quit on NaNo or something.

Thank you for your comprehension and my hand is exhausted.


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Hello there. I regret to inform that I'll be one Hiatus through November and first week of December for NaNoWriMo and I'd also like to inform that this story is place somewhere before Trial and Error but after As Time Goes by, so the messy tablet business doesn't get in the way. Enjoy!

«»

Dean walks back to the living room and sets the tray of hamburgers down on the table, slapping a couple of napkins next to it.

"Eat up." He invites, taking a burger of his own and wolfing it down. Man can he cook!

James and Henry stop discussing whatever they were discussing with Sam while he was gone and eagerly take one burger each.

"You have to cut Jude's up." James manages around a mouthful of burger.

"I'll do it." Castiel volunteers, adjusting the girl in his lap who stirs a little bit and then opens her eyes wide when she spots the hamburgers seating in the middle of the table.

Sam snorts "I wonder where they got they're eating habits." He snarks throwing a pointed look at Dean.

"At least my kid doesn't look like he's about to give his hamburger a back rub and threat it to some real fun times." He bitches back and Sam's head snaps to Henry who's currently talking sweetly to the piece of meat saying something that sounds disturbingly like "I'm going to eat you up."

"Dude, stop." James throws a disgusted look at Henry.

"Can't this is a piece of art."

"It's a meaty problem." James says and Dean snorts. Henry heaves a long suffering sigh.

"That was not even within twenty feet of the good puns department."

James shrugs and smiles around his burger "Am I burguering you?"

Henry slaps him upside the head for that.

"I swear to gramps, one more bad pun and I'm filling your conditioner with glitter again."

James scoffs "I don't wear conditioner. You're the one needing extra silky shampoo to treat your golden locks."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Guys!" Dean all but shouts over their little bitch fest "How about you both shut up and eat your burgers."

They shut up and sulk, chewing their burgers viciously.

"I swear to God. All of you, children." He shakes his head, pressing his smile down.

"Don't use the name of the Lord in vain." Castiel admonishes.

Dean snorts again and his about to make some witty remark when he notices that Cas ain't eating. He frowns and pushes the tray towards Cas.

"Didn't you hear me the first time? Eat up, Cas."

"I'm-"

"An angel of the Lord" Dean cuts him in, lowering his voice several octaves mimicking Cas's voice "I do not require food." Castiel bitchfaces at him "Well though luck, champ. 'Cause you're eating. Family dinner, you have no choice." Dean tells him and Cas glares a little bit more at him before he reaches for the burger and takes a tentative bite, closely followed by a moan. He takes a bigger more enthusiastic bite and Dean grins at him. Angel of the Lord my ass.

Jude jumps from Cas's lap and rushes towards Sam, pulling his sleeve with one greasy hand until he picks her up with a furrowed eyebrow and sets her on his lap.

James and Henry cackle at some inside joke and Dean looks momentarily confused by the change.

"Jude. Can you tell dad why you got of father's lap?"

Jude furrows her eyebrows in confusion "The rules?" she asks.

"Yeah, sure. Why don't you tell both your daddies the rules?" Henry prompts, squeezing his lips together.

Jude nods seriously, turning steady green eyes towards to Dean and then Cas "Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole. You don't take a joint from a guy named Don and there's no dogs in the car. Uncle Gabe is not allowed to touch Chevy. If I get lost I pray to one of daddies or gramps and they'll come get me. No entering daddies room if the door is shut and the numbers on the watch say ten."

"Why?" Henry interrupts the girl's careful speech.

Jude shrugs one shoulder "Uncle Balth says that's when they have their sexy fun time."

Dean chokes on his hamburger, coughing violently while sending the boys into hysterical laughing at him, Henry almost tipping his chair over as Sam snorts and pats him on the back until he can once again breath normally.

Cas on his side is looking thoroughly confused.

"She means S-E-X, Cas." Sam supplies helpfully, throwing a careful look at Jude and making sure she can't spell yet. The girl for all that's worth looks clueless.

Cas's eyes widen significantly and he looks at Dean and he's he? Holy shit, he's blushing like a fucking virgin. Well shit.

"And no being on either daddies laps when it's burgers." Jude continues.

"Why?" James interrupts and shit Dean better put the burger down before he dies by choking. That would be so shameful. Big bad hunter Dean Winchester dies by choking on a burger while his parallel universe daughter tells him about his parallel universe's sex habits.

"Uncle Gabe and uncle Balth say that it's papa's horny burgers." Dean wheezes at that and turns back to Cas who managed to flush three shades darker of red.

Well, isn't that a bit of information to store for later.

"Too much information." Sam mutters giving a critical look at his burger and putting it down with a pained look.

«»

Mary falls asleep in Sam's lap after dinner. Snoring softly and drooling all over Sam's plaid shirt, one hand twisted in his shirt and the other still twirling his hair absent mindedly.

James and Henry were tired because apparently dimension traveling takes a lot out of the boys, so Dean prepared a room ("We can sleep in a room. It's not biggie. Besides, James over here is a cuddler. The word going around is that he got it from you." Henry wiggles his eyebrows and James promptly slaps him upside the head) and offered to get some new clothes for them to sleep in, to which they had just smirked and in the blink of an eye, changed to their pajamas. James with a t-shirt and sweatpants and Henry to an actual silk pajama a starting shade of gold and "What are you Hugh Heffner?" to which he had only shrugged and said something about how it impressed the ladies.

After that they had both said goodnight and the boys had promptly fallen asleep on the bed, snoring and drooling a little bit.

When Dean had asked if they didn't want separate rooms they had shrugged and answered that they'd been sharing since James was created and they had sleep overs.

"So?" Sam asked when he got back to the living room.

"Sleeping like angels." Dean quips snorting at his own joke and getting a bitchface from Sam extensive repertoire and a confused look from Cas that immediately clarified that "Angels don't sleep, Dean."

"Whatever." He mutters "We have to talk." He says, taking little Jude from Sam – who's holding her wrong – and adjusting the kid in his arms, so she can sleep comfortably before he plops back down on one of the chairs.

Sam nods seriously and leans forward, eyes trained on Cas who's currently looking down at his hands like they're the most interesting he has ever seen.

"So?" Sam prompts Cas. The angel looking up carefully with wide scared eyes.

"Where the hell have you been, Cas?" Dean snaps trying to maintain his voice low and not jostle himself too much.

"I-I don't remember." He mutters "Heaven, I think." He mutters, still sounding confused "How long has it been since you last saw me?" he inquires curiously.

Dean's eyebrows shoot up at that.

How long? He doesn't even know how fucking long he's been gone?

"Weeks Cas! Weeks!"

"Apologies. I was not my intention to remain absent for so long."

"It was not your- I _prayed_ to you Cas. Every night and still nothing. What the hell, man?"

"You prayed to Cas?" Sam asks surprised, eyebrows reaching his hairline.

Cas looks startled "I didn't hear you. I- I'm sorry, Dean. There must be something wrong with me still." He looks back down at his hands and Dean cringes, slapping himself mentally upside the head.

"It's okay, just- Don't go pulling any more disappearing tricks on us, 'kay Cas?"

"I'm afraid that's completely out of my control."

"Cas if someone's doing this to you then we have to figure it out before they can do it again. Do you have any idea who could be doing this to you?" Sam asks worriedly, leaning forward on the table and trying to catch the angel's eyes.

Castiel looks up again, impossible blue eyes turning to Sam "Naomi." He blurts out, eyes widening when he says the name.

"That the bitch who been keeping you Cas?" Dean inquires, fists clenching.

"I would only presume so." He frowns "Although I don't know her reasons since I'm still alive. Since I came back I'm not Heaven's most famous guest." He almost mumbles and isn't that such a human thing to do. The mumbling it's almost as disturbing as when Cas was falling and suddenly he slept and ate.

"We've all done dumb shit. Don't sweat it Cas." Dean tries.

Castiel looks back down and continues frowning at his hands. Sam and Dean exchange a worried look before Dean decides this is enough excitement for a day. He stands up slowly and adjusts his grip on Mary Jude, letting her burry her face in the crook of his neck and clutch his shirt tightly.

"Say, how 'bout we all call it a night. I'd say this is enough shit for one day. I say fuck consciousness and let's sleep 'till noon." He suggests cheerily.

"Yeah, I'm beat." Sam yawns, getting up from the chair and biding his goodnight and running a hand through little Jude's hair before he goes to his room.

"How 'bout you, Cas?"

"Angels don't require sleep Dean." Cas says patiently.

"Yeah, but you can, right?" he asks, because he knows the answer and he's pretty sure he's not about to let Castiel fly off.

Cas does his puppy head tilt thing "Yes. Although I don't see wha-"

"Great!" Dean interrupts, before he can finish "Come on, I'll show you your room." He offers getting up from his chair and going to Cas, tugging lightly on his trenchcoat until the angel stands up and before he can protest.

Cas opens his mouth, but instead of the complaint that Dean is expecting what comes out is "You prepared me a room."

Dean blushes and clears his throat, leading Cas through the hallway "Well, yeah. You're family and even if you don't sleep I figured you'd like something to call your own right?"

Castiel smiles, truly honest to fucking God smiles at him and shit if that doesn't get Dean all tingly in all the right places.

"Thank you, Dean." He says earnestly, still smiling. Dean blushes a little further and clears his throat uncomfortably.

"Yeah, uh, anyway if you need anything I'm just across the hall and Sammy is two doors over." He adjust his grip on Mary, hiking her up his hip and being careful not to jolts her too much. She sniffles a little bit and clutches his shirt tighter.

"Yes, thank you Dean." Cas twist the doorknob open and peeks into the room, where Dean had already stashed a couple of books and made the bed with clean sheets.

"I put those there if you get bored." He supplies, pointing his chin towards the pile of books in the bedside table.

"You are a truly remarkable person, Dean Winchester."

He huffs at him, because only Castiel could say something like that and make him blush like a fucking virgin and what in the shit, it's just a room.

Dean shrugs or does the closest thing that he can to a shrug with an armful of little girl.

"Whatever. It's just a room." Cas opens his mouth, probably to sing more praise and Dean quickly shuts him up with a quick "'Night Cas."

Castiel nods, getting the hint and smiles a little "Goodnight Dean." he says before stepping forward, getting into Dean's personal space, and kissing Mary Jude on top of her head.

Dean knows he's gaping. He must be, because this is by far the humanest thing he has ever seen Castiel do ever.

"Muscle memory." The angel supplies "From Jimmy."

Oh! Right, Jimmy Novak. The guy Cas is wearing. Sometimes Dean forgets that what he sees isn't actual Castiel, just a human vessel that has gone through hell, heaven, purgatory and back.

You spend enough time with the guy and you start forgetting that, mainly because of how accustomed Cas has become with his human vessel.

Dean clears is throat awkwardly.

"Right. Goodnight Cas." He mutters, turning around and entering his own room and Cas goes to his and that's the end of that.

The little girl in his arms stirs muttering a garbled "Daddy?" and Dean sways her a little bit shushing her "Don't worry sweetheart, we're going to bed now."

Dean sets the little girl on the bed and takes of her shoes, a beat up pair of muddy sneakers. He carefully unbuttons her plaid shirt - seriously did he let Sam dress is kid? – folding it carefully and finding a green shirt underneath with MY DADDY KICKS BUTT written in big black letters across her chest. Dean snorts a laugh and takes that one off too, figuring that by now it must smell like sweaty kid, pie and grease.

The girl falls back to bed with a mumble and an adorable sniffle.

"Sweetheart, you have to work with me. Let's get you out of the sweaty clothes, yes?" he prompts gently, propping her back up while she mumbles something else.

Dean tugs one of his shirts over her head and sticks her little arms through the too big sleeves, the t-shirt falling down one of her shoulders.

"Okay, just one more." He prompts, popping the button of her jeans and slipping it down her legs. He folds those too, setting them next to the t-shirt and the plaid shirt and then setting those in the chair near his bed.

"All done." He whispers, kissing her once in the forehead, expertly pulling the covers down with one hand and tucking the girl in, placing a pillow in each side, so even if she rolls during her sleep she won't fall off the bed.

"Night, princess" he whispers, pulling the spilled locks of hair off of her face and tucking them safely behind her ears.

"Night daddy." She garbles, turning on her side and burrowing her face further into the covers.

Dean smiles feeling something warm and nice spill over his chest and oh dear lord he's having a moment isn't he? Well shit, if he didn't just completely fell in love with his daughter that isn't really his.

He picks up his clothes and goes to the bathroom to change since switching to his pajamas in the same room as a little girl just seems downright pervy, daughter or no daughter. And he could really use a shower, so he carefully tiptoes towards the bathroom and grabs a quick shower, washing the dirt and sweat off of him and enjoying the water pressure that it's just right.

Bless the men of letters and their need for awesome showers.

Dean turns off the water and hops of the shower, pulling on his boxers and sweatpants and one of his old shirts that already has a couple of holes in the bottom and a rip in one of his sleeves.

He hums a little bit to himself and wipes the steam out of the mirror, so he can wash his teeth and maybe he'll need to shave tomorrow. He shrugs at his reflection and then winks at it, before turning around and going back to his room.

He sings a little under his breath, Zeppelin, Mettalica, some pop-y songs he'll never admit to anyone he knows before he settles for an old one that's practically burned into his mind since he was one. He sings _Hey Jude_, stumbling across one or two verses before he gets the all thing right.

By the time he reaches his room he knows the entire song again, by heart and could probably say it backwards if asked too.

Well, probably not. Still it's a great song.

He pulls the covers back and slips into the bed quietly, trying not to startle little Mary Jude awake.

And that's when it hits him.

_Jude!_ Her name is Jude and shit if Dean isn't dumb as everything. A small smile spreading on his face when he realizes that he named his girl – that isn't really his, he has to remind himself to that – after his mother and after a song.

How very much of him to do that.

He makes sure that both pillows are placed currently in each side of the little girl before he lays down and allows himself to close his eyes.

"_Hey Jude, don't make it bad take a sad song and make it better, remember to let her into your heart then you can start to make it better."_ He sings softly.

The little girl beside him rolls over, kicking the pillow away even in her sleep and snuggles close to him. Little head laying on top of his arm, a hand clutching his shirt and bony knees digging into his ribs.

He smiles widely, because maybe, just maybe things aren't so bad after all. Maybe there's a little chance for something really good when all this shit with the demon tablet is over.

Dean closes his sighs heavily and finally - _finally_ – goes to sleep.


End file.
